‘Tis the Season to Shop
Posted on 30. Nov, 2009 by Andrea in Travel
They say confession is good for the soul so here goes…I’m a compulsive souvenir buyer. There.
Actually, I don’t really feel any better and the dust gathering on the multitudinous ornaments gathered from all over the world is still gaining weight even as I type.
I was browsing last minute deals to Berlin’s Christmas markets this year and wondering how people managed to buy anything with the luggage weight restrictions which nowadays act as therapy to my addiction.
There’s something in my brain that simply cannot transpose lovely things from their native location to the bookcase in my living room. If there was, I’d realise that the pastel, rainbow-coloured pottery of Zakynthos, the carved Buddhas of Thailand and the ebony Ganesha from Sri Lanka might just look out of place in a Victorian cottage in Stockport.
You also have to feel sorry for my friends and relations who, whenever my travels fall anywhere near Christmas, end up with batiks, painted teapots and shadow puppets in their Christmas stockings.
And it’s not just ornaments that find their way into my hand luggage or fill the suitcase to ‘HEAVY’ labelled capacity. For years I bought hooch from all over the world that was so quaffable when drunk in exotic locations under hot skies and nothing less than disgusting when re-located to the cold, hard reality of Britain. Bottles of raki from Greece (which incidentally is disgusting even when you’re in Greece), fenni from India and toddy from Sri Lanka slowly fermented to something very scary in the cupboard beneath the kitchen sink until I was packing to move to Tenerife and they had to finally be disposed of. I still remember the hangover I got off the fumes just from pouring them down the sink.
But I’m certain I’m not alone in that particular addiction. Come on, admit it…how many of you have bottles of Tenerife’s honey or banana rum gathering dust in the drinks cabinet right now?
My addiction reached its peak when I spent some time in Jamaica. I don’t know if it was the warm sunshine, the cool Reggae, the Red Stripe or just the whole ‘wafted here from Paradise’ feel but I wanted to take Jamaica home with me and ended up with masses of wood carvings. Amongst them was a Rastafarian head whose dreads doubled as an ash tray, an owl with four faces (I remember being particularly impressed with that at the time) and a mask the size of a small surf board which I spent 40 minutes trying to wedge into the bottom of my suitcase.
Years of taking hours to dust the shelves, combined with Draconian luggage restrictions has finally cured me of my addiction and I even managed to resist the prospect of some rock-bottom-priced Communist art from China not long ago.
A few months after I got back I read an article which said that those pictures are now very sought after and extremely valuable…d’oh!
Jamaican mask anyone? Make a great Christmas present…going cheap.
Andrea Montgomery
Freelance feature/travel writer and author of 2 travel guides, Andrea is a compulsive blogger and Tweeter with an annoying tendancy to behave like Head Girl (presumably because she never got to be one).
5 Responses to “‘Tis the Season to Shop”
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Phil Evans
30. Nov, 2009
My mothers passion for “collectables” has given me an almost rabid aversion to knick-knacks and ornaments that are anything but ornamental.
Some of her triumphs -
a plastic, revolving, singing gondolier with fairy lights
ugly glass clowns that still inhabit my nightmares
toilet roll covers disguised as flamenco dancers
a collection of jars filled with sand from the Sahara
My Will be probably be as simple as “ok, who gets the mouse mat?”
Andy Montgomery
01. Dec, 2009
Though I can’t rise to the Mildred Bucket standard of your mother, Phil, nevertheless, I suspect you’d hate our house! But your mum would love it here in Puerto, there’s a shop in the commercial centre that every Christmas fills up with rotating Virgin Mary’s and angels with flashing lights and hymnal accompaniment…would you like me to order one for her for Xmas?
Jack
01. Dec, 2009
I think your mum must have similar tastes to mine, Phil. She returned from Holland with a wooden windmill with red and green windows which lit up when it was plugged in.
The best thing about it was that you could wind up the sails so that they slowly turned whilst playing ‘tulips from Amsterdam’. It lived on top of the telly for years.
Phil
01. Dec, 2009
If I send her to Puerto it will be for more than 1 day – be warned she likes to “re-arrange” your storage !!
Rachael
01. Dec, 2009
This article really made me smile Andrea! It‚Äôs so true that these little trinkets speak to you when you‚Äôre on holiday. ‚ÄúI‚Äôm the most beautiful thing in the world…buy me and all of your friends will be impressed by the wonder of the country you‚Äôve just visited. Without me you will forget you were ever here. Your holiday pics won‚Äôt fully show the atmosphere of the place…you NEED meeeee!‚Äù
Hmmmm – is it just me that hears voices in souvenir shops?
My best holiday buy was a 3ft high hooka pipe in Egypt 5 years ago. I still love it, and although suburban Liverpool is no match for a Bedouin tent in the desert, I still use it! I buy the molasses tobacco and coals online, it is a great for garden parties. As for all the other tat (usually really shady jewellery) my mum ends up taking it to car boot sales the following year.